The Turker’s Gospel

The Bible According To Mechanical Turk Workers

Revelation 9:1-10

Revelation 9:1 - Angel number five made a huge noise, and then I watched a powerful, energetic light zoom down from heaven to the world. He received a special key that locked and unlocked the enormous hole that has no end. [Turker's Comment: This is talking about Jesus, who is the great star of the universe. He controls all, and He holds the key to the bottomless pit where all the demons go.]

Revelation 9:2 - And he took the cover of the endless pit, smoke came out of it like a huge fire, and so much smoke came out that the sun could not even be seen in the dark air. [Turker's Comment: The author is describing a scene where a terrifying pit is opened that smoke rises out of.]

Revelation 9:3 - From out of the smoke locusts arose and were given a great amount of power, similar the power of the scorpions.

Revelation 9:4 - They were commanded not to hurt any green plant, including grass and trees; but only the men who do not have God’s seal on their foreheads. [Turker's Comment: They cannot hurt living plants; but can hurt any man who does not have God's seal.]

Revelation 9:5 - Instead of being killed, they would be tortured for five months: they would be tortured as if a scorpion were stinging them.

Revelation 9:6 - In those days, men shall seek death and be unable to find it. All will wish to die but must live on in their suffering, for death will not come. [Turker's Comment: The suffering of the Coming is so great that all wish to die to end it, but that way out will not be allowed.]

Revelation 9:7 - The locusts looked like a group of horses going into batter, with what appeared to be gold crowns on their heads and faces like those of men. [Turker's Comment: The locusts looked worse than they really were.]

Revelation 9:8 - Their hair was like a womans and their teeth like a lions. [Turker's Comment: describing some mythical beast;]

Revelation 9:9 - And they had body armor made of iron; and their wings sounded like a group of horses galloping. [Turker's Comment: Describes an entity (unclear it's a person being described), fully armored and moving in a powerful way.]

Revelation 9:10 - Like scorpions they had tails and there were stings in their tails: and their power was to hurt men five months.

Revelation 9:11-21

Revelation 9:11 - And they were ruled by a king who was in fact the Angel of the Bottomless Pit, whose name in Hebrew was Abaddon, but in Greek, was Apollyon. [Turker's Comment: Unless one knows what the Greek and Hebrew names translate to, it is hard to know what John is trying to convey, but it is one of the few instances where he bothers to give a name in two languages and call attention to the fact.]

Revelation 9:12 - One problem was over, but then two more issues came up.

Revelation 9:13 - Then the sixth archangel played his trumpet, I heard the sound of the four horns coming from the gold altar of God. [Turker's Comment: Here the angels were heard the blowing the horns from the altar of God.]

Revelation 9:14 - Said to the sixth angel with the trumpet, Get rid of the four angels in the Euphrates river. [Turker's Comment: The sixth angel is being told to get rid of the 4 angels in the river.]

Revelation 9:15 - And the four angels were turned loose, to fulfill what they had been trained to do at this hour, on this day, in this month, in this year, which is to kill a third of mankind. [Turker's Comment: The four angels have been prepared to slay a third of mankind and were waiting for the exact time, in history, when they would be called and they were turned loose.]

Revelation 9:16 - The army of riders was two hundred million strong: I could hear every one of them.

Revelation 9:17 - In my dream I saw horses with riders wearing breastplates of fire and jacinth and brimstone, and the horses breathed smoke and fire and brimstone and had the heads of lions. [Turker's Comment: The dreamer saw true evil in the men and their horses.]

Revelation 9:18 - The third part of men was killed by fire, smoke, and brimstone, which came out of their mouths.

Revelation 9:19 - They breath fire and have sharp teeth and they have heads at the ends of their tails and they are very dangerous. [Turker's Comment: there are things worse than real life.]

Revelation 9:20 - Those of whom were spared the violence of the plagues still did not repent what they wrought with their hands, that they should not worship the unclean spirits of the wild, nor fashioned idols of precious metals: which they could not perceive nor walk:; [Turker's Comment: Old Testament, maybe, after Moses came down from the mountain? Or not? I don't know, but I think I did a good job keeping the meaning of this one intact.]

Revelation 9:21 - The guilty never felt sorry about the people they had killed, the items they had stolen, the adultery they had engaged in, or the crimes they had committed. [Turker's Comment: The criminals didn't feel sorry for the crimes they had committed.]