The Turker’s Gospel

The Bible According To Mechanical Turk Workers

Matthew 24:1-10

24:1 - Jesus went outside the temple and his disciples followed so they could show him around the area.

24:2 - And Jesus said, do you see these things? I tell you surely, there will not be one stone on top of any other, that will not be destroyed.

24:3 - And as he was sitting on the mountain of Olives, the disciples approached him in secret, asking, Tell us when will these events happen? and what will be a sign that you are coming, and when will the world end be?

24:4 - Jesus told them to be wary and let no man deceive them.

24:5 - There will be many who come claiming to be me, Christ; and they will fool many.

24:6 - People will tell you about conflicts around the world but don’t worry, for whilst there will be war, this is not the end of the world yet.

24:7 - Nations will rise up against one another, kingdoms will fall upon each other, people will starve, disease will spread, and earthquakes will rumble the earth.

24:8 - This is the beginning of melancholy.

24:9 - Then they will turn you over to be tortured, and will even kill you; and you will be despised by all peoples for the sake of My name.

24:10 - Almost everyone will be offended, will stab each other in the back, and will hate on each other.

Matthew 24:11-20

24:11 - There are going to be many fake psychics who are going to fool a whole lot of people.

24:12 - Love shall abound, and because of the iniquity many shall wax cold

24:13 - For the one that can last until the end, he will be saved.

24:14 - And this gospel of God’s kingdom will be preached throughout the whole world; and then the end will come.

24:15 - Then you will see the abomination of desolation, Daniel the prophet told you about, stand in the holy place, (let any who reads this, understand:)

24:16 - Everyone who lives in Judaea must flee to the mountains.

24:17 - Let he who is on the roof not come down to take anything out of his house:

24:18 - And don’t let him come back into the field to get his clothing.

24:19 - A warning to those who are pregnant or nursing!

24:20 - Pray that your flight is not in the winter or on the sabbath day.

Matthew 24:21-30

24:21 - Then there will be very hard times, like nothing that has happened since the beginning of the world, no, and nothing will ever be.

24:22 - Then time will run short and nothing living will remain, except for the chosen.

24:23 - If any man were to say to you, here is Christ, do not believe him.

24:24 - Untrue prophets and people claiming to be the Christ will show themselves, and they will do amazing things to try and fool even the most knowledgeable people will believe them.

24:25 - Listen, I have told you before.

24:26 - So if they tell you not to go because he is in the desert, in the secret chamber, don’t believe it.

24:27 - As the lighting comes from the east, and shines as far as the west, this is what the coming of the son of man will be like.

24:28 - You’ll find the body where the vultures are hanging out.

24:29 - Following the tribulation, there will be no light from the sun, moon, or stars. The order of things as we know them will be changed drastically.

24:30 - The sign of the Son of man will burn in the sky and bring sorrow to nations of earth, and they will look up and witness his return in all its power and glory.

Matthew 24:31-40

24:31 - And He will send His messengers with a powerful blast of a trumpet, and they will assemble His chosen from all directions, and from one end of the Universe to the other.

24:32 - Learn the parable about the fig tree; When the branch is tender, and is growing leaves, you know that summer is on the way;

24:33 - So you too, when you view all of these events, will know that the time is coming soon.

24:34 - Believe what I tell you, This generation will not die, until things things I have said have been fulfilled.

24:35 - Heaven and earth will not remain, but my words will remain forever.

24:36 - God only knows when that day will come.

24:37 - Just like it was in the time of Noe, it will be this way to when the Son of man comes.

24:38 - There was a big hedonistic party before the flood, and it lasted until Noe left on the ark,

24:39 - They didn’t know when the flood was going to happen when it swept them away. Christ’s second coming will be the same way–unexpected.

24:40 - Two people will be before me; one I will bring with me, and the other will remain behind on the earth.

Matthew 24:41-51

24:41 - Two women will be grinding at the mill; one will be taken while the other will be left behind.

24:42 - You should watch carefully, since you have no idea when God is coming.

24:43 - If the homeowner had known when the thief was going to break in, he’d have stayed awake to catch him.

24:44 - Always be ready, the Son of man can come at anytime.

24:45 - Then, who is a wise and faithful servant, that the Lord placed in authority over his household, to give them meat when the time comes.

24:46 - The servant who the Lord finds doing so is blessed.

24:47 - Truthfully, I am telling you, that he will be put in charge of all his property.

24:48 - But if the evil one remains in his heart then the lord will delay his arrival.

24:49 - And will start to kill his colleagues and eat and drink with the drunken people;

24:50 - The Master of that servant will come during the day time when he is not looking forward to meet him and at such a time when he is not expecting him.

24:51 - Of the evil one to be put under and sent to the hypocrites with weeping and gnashing of teeth.