The Turker’s Gospel

The Bible According To Mechanical Turk Workers

Mark 2:1-10

Mark 2:1 - After a few days, he returned to Capernaum and everone knew he was in the house.

Mark 2:2 - Immediately, the room was overflowing and he began to minister to those who came.

Mark 2:3 - And they came to him, bringing a person that was afflicted by the palsy, who was being carried by four.

Mark 2:4 - And when they couldn’t get close to him because of the crowd, the made a hole in the roof over him: and when the hole was big enough, they carefully lowered the sick man’s pallet through it.

Mark 2:5 - Son, thy sins be forgiven thee is what Jesus said unto the sick of the palsy when he saw their faith.

Mark 2:6 - But there were some men of knowledge sitting there, reflecting,

Mark 2:7 - Why does this man say such blasphemy? Who but God can forgive?

Mark 2:8 - There is no need to reason if you feel it in your heart.

Mark 2:9 - Does it make any difference if I tell him that he is no longer condemned by his wrong-doings or to get up and walk, if the esult is the same either way and he is healed?

Mark 2:10 - To the afflicted he said: So that you will know that the Son of Man has the power to forgive your earthly sins,

Mark 2:11-20

Mark 2:11 - I’m telling you, get up, and take your bed, and go home.

Mark 2:12 - He immediately stood up, picked up his bedding and walked around them, and they were amazed and gave Glory to God by saying, We never saw anything like this!

Mark 2:13 - And he stood there on the shore; and the crowds flocked towards him, and he educated them.

Mark 2:14 - And passing by, he saw Levi who was the son of Alphaeus sitting at the receipt of custom, and he said to him, Follow me. And he got up and followed him.

Mark 2:15 - And at some point or another, while Jesus was having dinner, many tax collectors and immoral people actually sat with Jesus and his students: there were so many, and they followed him.

Mark 2:16 - And when the scribes and the Pharisees saw him eating with the tax collectors and the sinners ,they told his disciples ,How is he able to eat and drink with such people.

Mark 2:17 - Jesus said, I have come to help the sinners not the righteous, for those that are healthy need no healer, while those who are sick need my help.

Mark 2:18 - And the disciples of John and the Pharisees fasted: and they went to him and asked, Why do the disciples of John and the Pharisees fast, but yours do not?

Mark 2:19 - And Jesus said to them, Can the children of the bridechamber fast, as long as the bridegroom is still with them? As long as the bridegroom is with them, they are unable to fast.

Mark 2:20 - One day, the groom will be taken away and they will fast when he is gone.

Mark 2:21-28

Mark 2:21 - It doesn’t make sense to repair an old garment with new cloth because the new cloth is so much stronger that it will cause the old cloth to tear away even more.

Mark 2:22 - New wine needs to be put into new bottles, because if new wine is put into old bottles, the bottles can explode which causes both the wine and the bottles to be lost.

Mark 2:23 - One day he was walking through the corn fields on the sabbath day, when his disciples began to pick a few ears of corn.

Mark 2:24 - The Pharisees wanted to know why they would use the sabbath to do the things they know they aren’t supposed to be doing.

Mark 2:25 - He said to them, have you never heard of what David did when he and his colleagues were hungry and in need?

Mark 2:26 - He and his companions went into the house of God in the days of Abiathar the high priest, and they ate the shewbread that only priests are allowed.

Mark 2:27 - He told them that man wasn’t created for the sabbath, but that the sabbath was created for man.

Mark 2:28 - So this means that the Lord of the Sabbath is also the Son of man.