The Turker’s Gospel

The Bible According To Mechanical Turk Workers

Luke 3:1-10

3:1 - They have ruled Tiberius for fifteen years.

3:2 - The high priests Annas and Caiaphas, Gods word was given to John the son of Zacharias in the wild.

3:3 - And he went to all the countries surrounding Jordan to preach the baptism of repentance for peoples sins;

3:4 - It’s written in the book of Esaias the prophet that the voice of someone yelling in the wilderness says to make way for the Lord and get ready for his coming.

3:5 - Everything was made equal.

3:6 - And everyone will witness the salvation provided by God.

3:7 - Then he said to the crowd which had come to have him baptize them: Oh, you hypocritical snakes, who warned you to run from the wrath which is about to descend upon you?

3:8 - Bring me evidence that you deserve forgiveness, and do not say to yourselves that since Abraham is your father you are forgiven: for I assure you, God is able to punish Abraham’s children.

3:9 - Now the axe falls upon the roots of trees: any tree which does not bear good fruit is cut down and thrown into the fire.

3:10 - So they asked him, What should we do?

Luke 3:11-20

3:11 - He said to them, The man that has two coats should give one to the man with no coat and a man with meat should give meat to those who have none.

3:12 - Then the tax collectors came to be baptized, asking: Master, what should we do?

3:13 - He said to them, Don’t take more than you are supposed to you.

3:14 - And the soldiers also asked, what will we do? And he told them, do violence to no one, nor lie about them; be happy with your income.

3:15 - The people were expecting great things to happen, so when they saw John the Baptist and watched what he was doing, they began to wonder if he was the Messiah.

3:16 - John replied, I baptize you with water, but someone greater that me is coming whose shoelaces I am unworthy to untie and he will baptize you in the Holy Ghost:

3:17 - He has his fan at hand, he can clean his floor completely and he will gather all of his wheat, but all of his chaff will burn with a fire that is unstoppable.

3:18 - He preached to the people, advising them about many things.

3:19 - But Herod, being reproved about Herodias and the wife of his brother (Philip) and for all the evil which Herod had committed,

3:20 - In addition to all this, and foremost among all the rest, he was to imprison John.

Luke 3:21-30

3:21 - After everyone was baptized Jesus was also baptized, and then the heavens were opened.

3:22 - The Holy Ghost floated down in the form of a bird, and the sky rang with these words: You are my Son, my pride and my love.

3:23 - Jesus approached the age of thirty, as he was supposedly the son of Joseph, who was the son of Heli

3:24 - Who was Matthat’s son. Matthat himself was the son of Levi and the grandson of Melchi. And Melchi’s father was Janna and his grandfather Joseph,

3:25 - He was the son of Mattathias, whose father was Amos, whose father was Naum, whose father was Esli, whose father was Nagge.

3:26 - The son of Maath, who is the son of Mattathias, is the son of Semei, who happened to be the son of Joesph, that was the son of Jude,

3:27 - He was the son of Joanna, who was the fourth generation decendant of Neri.

3:28 - Who was the son of Melchi whose father was Addi and whose grandfather was Cosam. Cosam, in turn, was Elmodam’s son and Er’s grandson.

3:29 - Who was Jose’s son and Eliezer’s grandson. Elizier’s father was Jorim, his grandfather was Matthat and his great-grandfather was Levi,

3:30 - Eliakim fathered Jonan who fathered Joseph, who fathered Juda, who fathered Simeon.

Luke 3:31-38

3:31 - Who was Melea’s son and Menan’s grandson. Menan himself was the son of Mattaha and the grandson of Nathan. And Nathan in turn was David’s son

3:32 - Who was the son of Jesse, who was the son of Obed, who was the son of Booz, who was the son of Salmon, who was the son of Naasson,

3:33 - He was the son of Aminadab, who was the son of Aram, who was the son of Esrom, who was the son of Phares, who was the son of Juda.

3:34 - Who was Jacob’s son, who was Isaac’s son, who was Abraham’s song, who was Thara’s son, who was Nachor’s son

3:35 - The son of Saruch, who was the son of Ragau, who was the son of Phalec, who was the son of Heber, who was the son of Sala,

3:36 - The son of Cainan, who was the son of Arphaxad, who was the son of Sem, who was the son of Noe, who was the son of Lamech,

3:37 - Cainan had a son, Maleleel, who had a son Jared, who then had Enoch and Enoch had a son Mathusala.

3:38 - Who was the son of Enos, who was the son of Seth, who was the son of Adam, who was the son of God.